defined success as being able
to wake up each morning
and say these heartfelt words
to themselves:
damn, today's gonna be
another helluva brilliant day
and im so ready to kick major ass!
quite apt, isnt it?
i have to admit that
the closest i've ever been
to this
is feeling absolutely in awe
on sunday mornings realising
there is time for
guilt-free TV/reading.
the awe usually lasts a
grand total of about 3 seconds,
before i am jolted
into brutal reality that the
following day is a working day.
the concept is that
if i prep myself up for
a terrible day ahead,
preemt all possible
worst-case scenarios,
at least it would be
comforting to know that
it cant get any worse.
thats why i think its great
that people go to
church on sundays.
they put some sort of closure
to the previous week
and set a new perspective for
the coming week.
much unlike my sundays,
which are dreadful preludes
to the longdrawn workweek.
but in a sense
i fear the commitment of
church-going
when it eventually mutates into
another chore in my life that
robs me of time for guilt pleasures.
that's probably sinful,
but that's me- for now at least.
speaking of commitment
on the longterm.
my long overdued intention to
commit to a cause/home on
a regular, long-term basis.
ive never really gone pass the
stage of
research and liaising,
because somewhere along
the way of lacklustre replies,
i let it wait.
but recently while talking to
pauline (one of my favourite people),
i think we both decided
we wanted this to materialise.
in more ways then one,
it'll be an education for myself.
altho a part of me wonders how
much i can offer and how far i am
willing to bend backwards to
fit this commitment into my life,
i still wish for myself to
embark on something purposeful.
it'll be refreshing when
my life stop operating
merely on the
basis of convenience and
necessity.
it'll be beautiful if i come
to a point in my life
when i no longer have to
morbidly wish
to not need
to wake up the next morning
to face the tribulations of the
strange, strange world.
1:11 PM